Monday, March 2, 2009

WIFE SWAP!! Hot Pork Sandwich Edition

A few weekends ago (the day after Valentines Day), I starred in an upcoming episode of WIFE SWAP!!

While Sean and our newly acquired friend Sarah studied for their med school exams, Sarah's husband and I went WIFE SWAPPING...I mean SNOW FUNNING!! The episode will never be aired because the swappers got along too well and then the two couples ate Beef Borguianon at the end of the day unlike the unfortunate wife swappers below.








That was part 1 of 5 - I watched the whole thing and it was enlightening. That "Feminist pig" "indoctrinating" her children with such rubbish such as doing their homework and having self-respect. How dare she teach a beauty queen to bake brownies!!

James and I hit the slopes something fierce on our swap day - and it was a beautiful day. Blue skies and warm sun - but not warm enough to melt the snow. Just warm enough to keep it soft. Soft and warm like you like your balogna.



Back to my episode of Wife Swap. James and I went to Lutsen, which is a ski hill in Minnesota. Lutsen is built on a ravine and the runs are located on either side of the ravine. The chalet is half way up the one side of the ravine, which can make for some interesting navigating. St. James had to tow me for some flats and uphills on the way from one side of the ravine to the other near the end of the day. It's good to have friends with poles.

A couple of the runs at Lutsen had amusing names.

If "Caroline's Challenge" is anything like Caroline in the City, the run is full of wacky neighbors and introspective loathing.



Brule Run!!! For your health!!



Brules Rules - Funny home videos are a click away

I looked at Lutsen's slopside entertainment listings and sadly, we missed some sweet, sweet live shows. I can't believe we missed "Big & Tall Men", a Supergroup comprised of the drummer from "Boiled in Lead", some dudes from bands called "Hot Pork Sandwich", "Gooney Birds" & "Cats Under the Stars" and the bassist from "Kung Fu Hippies".

That is one amazing collection of small-town band names. Hot Pork Sandwich? That's much too close to my Supergroup, "Cold Fish Taco", featuring...

Danny Partridge on the bass...

Kimber from Jem & the Holograms on the Keytar...

Glenn Danzig on vocals (hopefully he and Kimber can put aside their differences from his days with The Misfits).

Glenn is backed by the ladies from "Hot Sundaes". Hopefully Jesse has kicked that caffiene habit. Glenn doesn't tolerate any substances in the band.



and Miley Cyrus on drums

My cousin Fiora is the band manager and I am their evil overlord who will lure them into a world of sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll never fathomed by our grandparents or your creepy uncles.





In other Supergroup news, James Iha from "Smashing Pumpkins", the girl from "Hanson", the bassist from "Fountains of Wayne" (anyone remember "Stacey's Mom"?) and the drummer from "Cheap Trick" (back from the grave) have formed a Supergroup called Tinted Windows. The apocalypse draws near, and it's probably wearing a Chip & Pepper t-shirt.



For my health, I joined a gym in Thunder Bay. It's called "McFit" and they have free Tootsie Rolls. It's only 49 cents a day, Dummy!!




I'll leave you with the amazing conversation I overheard in the McFit change room the other day. Two girls came into the change room at around 630am while I was putting on my running shoes.

Girl #1 - I'm soooo hung over. I don't even remember leaving the bar last night
Girl #2 - Yeah - you were drunk
Girl #1 - I'm going to finish reading Twilight during Psych today
Girl #2 - Yeah
Girl #1 - I'm definitely going to take a nap this afternoon
Girl #2 - I'm definitely going to make a card for my friend this afternoon

What? Was that a conversation?

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2 comments:

  1. katmiddsMarch 3, 2009 at 1:02 AM

    YOU'RE WORKING OUT AT MCFIT!?!?!!? AHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAA
    AAAAAHHAHA
    HAHAHAH
    HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
    HA

    HA

    awesome

    ReplyDelete
  2. SeanMarch 4, 2009 at 1:35 PM

    if you knew what the german website for mcfit looked like, you'd work out there too, katherine.

    ReplyDelete

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